She could have easily faded away.
Fifty was approaching fast. Her waistline was growing fast. Another fifty something. Settling on the comfort of an elastic waistband and a flowing top to hide a multitude of sins. Stick with the brunette turning to grey. Best fade into the shadows…
But as the elastic stretched as far as it could go, she knew she was not going to fade away like that, there are good ways to fade away, but not fade away. She ‘got on it’… eating well, cutting the ‘I need this’ glass of wine, thinking about what she chucked inside her body. And she started to fade away in a good way. Gathering up that wardrobe full of extra dress sizes she had been collecting and ceremoniously dropping them.
The more she faded away, the less she faded away. Confidence grew.
As she faded further she discovered she could run. Pounding the pavements, rain and shine. Enjoying the sweat, the buzz, the breathless energy.
Then her knee faded. Inside, slow deterioration. Fading meniscus, fading bone. Osteoarthritis. She felt defeated. Fitter than she had ever been, but kicked in the teeth by age.
But no fading for her… she held her nerve, kept hold of that confidence. She went into that place she swore she would never enter, the gym. She kept on it. No pounding now though. She was not going to fade this far and go back to becoming faded.
She was determined…
… the faded away, but so not faded away woman.
She struggles. She’s not superwoman. Crisps and cakes and wine tempt her. Sometimes she submits to their charms. Others not. Dragging herself to the gym is a struggle some days. Sometimes she can’t be arsed, other days she gets her arse down there. Some days she simply jumps around the front room.
But struggles are good. She needs something to fight against. And she keeps fighting.
And fifty… well that didn’t matter, nor did the next three years. Nor will the next twenty.
One thing is for sure that old girl didn’t fade away, she’s brighter, fitter, shinier than she has ever been.
All that is faded now is the pink in her hair after a few washes, but hey that’s an easy fix…